Rainbow Love

i'm crying now.
out of desperation.

Lord, hear my cries.
hear my desire to want to change this ugly personality into an image of yours.
hear my cries to want to stop being selfish.
hear my cries to want to be a salt and light for you.
i'm sorry oh Lord,
for the lies. for being selfish.
heal this aching pain in me. pain that i've experienced because of guilt.
i'm sorry.
amen.


i need to confess.
an open confession.

i'm sorry erlina, alan & rooney.
i'm sorry for being a selfish leader. for not wanting to go forth to school to help submit report.
i'm sorry because ytd i know that alan had called, but i did not pick up the phone.
i'm sorry because i've been a very terrible group member.
i know its hard to forgive me right now.
i'm just very sorry. that's the only thing i can say now.



):
tears just keep rolling down my cheek when i know i've failed be a salt and light for God.
my heart just keep aching when i know that i've sinned by telling lies.
my heart constantly aches when i know that i'm actually a horrible person.

but,

my heart also desires to be a better person.
i'm more determined to walk the way in Christ.
i'm more determined to live in Christ.

don't despise me, my friends.
but i pray for encouragement.

loves.