contentment leads to feeling blessed (:

i think the most important factor to have in order to feel really blessed irregardless of what, is Contentment.



to be content with whatever you have, be it money, family, relationship, career or any other thing, then you'll feel blessed.

after contentment, comes no comparision.

you cannot compare yourself to any other people.

because once you start comparing, you can never stop comparing and it'll only make yourself feel more lousy.



i admit i haven't been placing the latter factor in my life.

i've been always comparing. always envying the people around me.

why is it they can have this, they can have that without doing anything at all! but yet, i slog my way out so much, yet i do not have any of these blessings that they had received.



& when evelyn shared during cellgroup, in my heart i was thinking, oh man. i feel like the one who have not received much blessings at all!



but then, i rebuked myself. because i know its not true at all.

i may not have a perfect family(though i know nothing is perfect except God), i may not had the perfect environment with loving parents to grow up in, i may not have perfect grades, i may not have the bestest friends around. but i'm so blessed!



because for the fact i can live till this day and smile, it means God has still been blessing me.

if God had not blessed me, i would be dead and somewhere in hell i guess.

so i give thanks!



recently, i have drifted apart from many people including ina.

i still do not know what value do i have to two of these many people.

& i've been feeling really sore about it.

and i can only entrust it all to God.

if its' because i always go to church, if its' because i'm always busy with activities in church that i can't meet up with my friends, i rather it stay that way.

because if it's all for God, its' all worthwhile.



Lord, help me please.

i'm struggling with this issue.

because i love them as my friends.

but it hurts.

it hurts to be just forgotten, neglected.

as if i never meant anything.

i commit all these hurts to you.

amen.



i led worship in cg for the first time on Sunday.

and i made PLENTY of mistakes.

i was so embarassed.

i felt so lousy. and still feel lousy

bleah.





i'm finishing work in an exact 59 minutes.

and i'm jumping for joy.

time passed fast with all the loads of work dumped on me

hahaa.

LOVES





meeting polar later.

wheees. 7 days in a row.

i have never met him for 7 days in a row

see? i'm BLESSED (: