dry bones in the valley

CBTL is finally over. (:
all the practices and all. haha. it's been so amazing. this is already the 3rd CBTL i've participated in. and every year, it just gets better & better.

recently, i've been going through emotional roller coaster rides. perhaps out of all this, i've learnt my lessons. to trust in God. it wasn't easy at all. emotionally stressed; not knowing what to do. feeling so lousy and lost. i thank God for LFC though. cause through them, i really was able to just relax my mind. and join in all the fun and laughter (: (especially christine)

haha. so yesterday before cbtl started, elder wee boon shared with us something to encourage us. he asked if we were dry bones in the valley? he also said something like asking us to ask God to give us flesh if we're dry. that through all these preparation for CBTL, it's not bout how well we sing, how much we practiced, but it's really all about God.

and yes, indeed i was so dry. so dry, so tired. both physically and mentally. But after praying, God just took over me. I wasn't depending on my physical body anymore. I felt as if a greater strength has been placed upon me, and i was ready to worship the most high God.

after the 17 or 18 songs, SP Dan Foo shared Psalms 20.
it was really good for me,
for it says,

Psalm 20
For the director of music. A psalm of David.
1 May the LORD answer you when you are in distress; may the name of the God of Jacob protect you.

2 May he send you help from the sanctuary and grant you support from Zion.

3 May he remember all your sacrifices and accept your burnt offerings. Selah

4 May he give you the desire of your heart and make all your plans succeed.

5 We will shout for joy when you are victorious and will lift up our banners in the name of our God. May the LORD grant all your requests.

6 Now I know that the LORD saves his anointed; he answers him from his holy heaven with the saving power of his right hand.

7 Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the LORD our God.
8 They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.

9 O LORD, save the king! Answer [a] us when we call!

I was simply amazed. because God was like directly telling me something. The last few weeks, i've been begging God to love me more, to fill me more, even when i don't deserve it, please love me more. and yesterday his words just came to me.

"you don't have to begged me to save you. you don't have to begged me to love you. you don't have to begged me to be with you. I sent my only son to die on the cross for you, that's already part of my love for you. I am always with you as i promised. I know you even before the day you were borned. don't begged anymore. instead, open your heart to me and just receive"

and even when i'm in distress, i need not beg, i just have to call out for help. a single call for help to God will let his help be on his way. it may not be immediately, but it'll definitely reach.

and this is when, i just felt so touched by the word of God, by his spirit. and when dorcas started praying blessings over me. she just was able to pray the right things for me. God was just revealing himself, his grace over me.

how awesome are you dear Lord.
indeed this is a great experience this year (: