time flies.

the above. time really flies.
i got my 3rd pay check already!
my next pay will be GIRO. hurray (:


this week was really a blast.
i was really tired. exhausted. you name it, i feel it.
it started off with only managing to catch 4 hours of sleep on sunday night. having to work at 7am on monday. and then a whole day out with friends. then i slept late again. it continued like this throughout the whole week, not managing to get enough sleep. zzzz.
affected my performance at work.
but i shall never let it pull me down (:

i learnt from my mistakes this week. a painful mistake. but something i shall remember (:
and finally friday. hurrays (:
went jb with baby, his brother and aaron. jam -.-"
can make do with it once in a while but not always!
haha.

so i slept at 5am this morning. sighhh. i'm still so sleepy.

recently, i have decided to seek God for smth that holds an important place in my heart.
as i seek God, i really gained a lot. and God really gave me some ideas that spoke to me. i'm still not too sure about it. whether is it really from God, but i will continue to pray. and the idea God gave me is really something that i do not want. but yet, as a child of God, i'm called to obey.

i'm meeting baby at 9+. think i have to take a bus down to bedok. don't think he want to come fetch me. (:

ina is diving. i miss her (:

work is awesome (:

i have never ever had this kind of joy whenever i leave my house for work.
this is my first ever job that i had never dreaded each day to go work.
i just look so forward to going work and see those children!

hehe.
i love!

i'm so addicted to the beautiful dresses online.
so i ordered another two from taiwan and korean pre-order.
so glad!
hehe.

but i know i have to work harder to save up money.
bleahhh.

just a short update.
and oh i'm so happy bout something else.
right ina?
(:



love you peepo !

p.s. my life is all about reaching out and touching the lives of children right now. whatever it takes, i will do my best. they are way more important than me, than my life (:

I have an Awesome God.

days have been flying past so fast that i can barely catch my breath.
i was once again defeated by my own health.
went to work with a sickening flu and drowsiness.

but really thank God that Aunty Margaret asked me to return home at 12pm, after the morning session was released. i didn't ask for it. i wanted to stay because i know it is my responsibility and that i was supposed to do teabreak and closing. but i was really giddy that i could hardly walk around. so i cabbed back.
and many sorrys to Aunty Catherine and Aunty Margaret, having to take all my roles for the day and having to go home late ):

i owe them one.

many exciting events are coming up. some are events that i think i'm not capable of doing.
some are events that simply blows me off my feets.
for example, the coming up combined choir for GDOP. those who don't know what GDOP is, it means Global Day of Prayer.
singing in choir at a country level. hmmm. i have been discouraged to a certain extent.
due to my work, i have not been attending choir practices for the last 3 sessions.

i know that people have been telling me i have improved so much in my singing techniques since i first joined and that i can sing. that singing can be nurtured. you may not have the talent, but if you practice hard and well, your singing will be okay.
but then again, i really am discouraged. discouraged by the alto parts.
my first challenge came when i had to stop singing melody but parts instead.
and that's smth i have difficulties with.

and it affects my worship with God. because i'm too concerned bout the way i produce the sounds, the way my parts turn out to be. so instead of gaining, being refreshed and renewed, i'm throughly drained.

is this supposedly the way of worship. i doubt so. but GDOP is a new challenge. to face myself, to learn new things from other members of different churches.


and my next tiring event will be the whole of june holidays.
it'll be a month of just planning and planning for the children. i really need a lot of stamina for this. i cannot fall sick.
irregardless of how many times, i tell myself that, i still fall sick.

and i think highquest: transformation from worry to rest. is trying to speak to me. why am i worrying about falling sick. when i have a Big God?
this is stupid and dumb.


baby is in camp now. i'm glad i can meet him for dinner tmr. it'll be good to chat with him again.
things went haywired last Sunday, but we ended it off well with a great swim at Changi (:

today i was just sitting down and recollecting bout the past.
because tmr will be our 19th month together.
the first day we met was in church.
and i could not take my eyes off him.

i realized smth bout myself. that i can never be able to mutter the words "i love you" unless it is unto someone whom i really love with all of my heart.
we went through so much. so much to get to this day.
from all the busy-ness. from you graduating, to work, to army. the days that we could hardly meet, we pulled through all. and now the greater challenge. army.
but because of all these trials, we bonded even better. as we look forward to marriage hand in hands, i believe God will provide ways for us.

looking at the ring that you've given me with the promise that you'll marry me and love me, i just feel so much warmth in my heart.
i pray that God will just continue to be in control of our relationship. help us to shine together as a couple. help us be a good role model to the younger ones.
i pray that He will continue to pour out his blessings on both of us.
amen (:



i know my post is a lil draggy today.
but i'm trying to do some reflections (:


thank God for everything in my life right now.
God is awesome!

(:

my dear children in my group for amazing race at terminal 3.
shiming (:
Amanda, primary 1. hyperactive student.
my love. (:



its sunday already. time really flies. SIGH!

yay. BBTC choir is singing for GDOP this year!!
thanks to Cornerstone church (:


lovessss.

hectic week :/

i had a hectic week.
i don't know why, but this week seemed to just fly so fast.
so many things happened.
and i'm quite drained physically (:

baby got his posting. not what he wanted. and it really wasn't fair.
but i could only say that it's really God's will. :/

i was able to meet up with him every night. being by his side just makes me feel more important.
haha. and so the week flew past

had bbq with annette and emily plus baby along.
i set up the fire (:
haha. a first time man.

then, i also managed to catch Spiderwick Chronicles. great show!
i like.


today was photohunt for cellgroup.
i know i didn't do a great job. but i hope i will be able to do even better for the next event.
i admit i didn't put enough time into planning.
but i will try again next time!

thanks to those who made it, appreciate it a lot (:

children love.

good news: i'm going for church camp.

2nd good news: i passed the first test in student care. quoted from aunty margaret to aunty eling.

haha.

without God, i really won't be able to achieve much in student care (:

now, i'm so encouraged. (:

baby managed to get company best. and he's passing out this wednesday. i know it wasn't easy for him to reach there. i'm proud of him. and i know it's really God pouring out His blessing on to baby unconditionally. "seek first his righteousness and his kingdom will be given to you." "Ask and you will receive"

(: well done my baby!

and of course i'm going to tekong on wednesday (:

i've got leave already. praise God for that too.

right now, life is really taking a different turn for me.

a job that i really love a lot.

new work environment.

new understanding of life.

but also, i'm facing some major difficulties.

hmmmm.

anyway thanks to student care and caron, i met a new friend named xin en.

she's one year younger than me, but we really get along well.

so i set my mind on befriending her as well as being a good role model in Christ.

she just came back to BBTC recently. and thank God for showing her to me.

at least, its like i know one more person outside SHALOM (:

tmr i'm meeting her for dinner again. so glad (:

payday is next week.

but i calculated all my payments - bills, allowances, savings.

and i'm done for. haha. but i tell you, God never fails to provide for me!

lots of love people (:

back with updates.

i haven't blogged for quite sometime!

i finally settled down into my first official working week at Telok Kurau Primary Student Care.
i have a lot of reflections and observations which would be a little too private to comment here.
but whatever it is, it is all in God's hand.

my whole week has been really blessed with the Spirit of Joy. but it sort of lessened on thurs and friday. and i fell sick again due to the rain. the vitamin Cs don't seem to be working.
): i have been coughing for a month already :x (not to worry though, saw a doctor today, took an X-ray. he said everything is normal. ((: )
i'm glad!

so new environment, new aunties to work with. new students to cope and build rapport with. supervisor is back from leave. and there is a certain level of stress. but God is my mighty mighty source of strength!

heh :x
oh btw, i received my first pay check too. i'm overjoyed. but it's depleting fast. thank God i saved up a portion in my other account. ((:


anyway, i think very soon. i'll just quit blogging.
hehe. there's no time! (:


love all of you with God's love and mine (:

my tagboard has gone nuts.

i can't remember my login id and password to my tagboard's website.
so i really can't be bothered now. not at the moment cause its only 7 am.
my eyes ain't fully awake yet.

have to leave for work in half an hour. but it's a really look forward to.
every new day has the different challenges for me to handle.
(:

i spent the terrific weekends with my baby. though he booked in at 4pm on sunday.
he's super super sweet.
on friday night, he pop by church (while i thought he was still in camp) and he surprised me!
haha. really love him lots. and we managed to catch a movie "P.S. I love You" and it's a really must catch. so touching!! haha.

i miss him dearly.
haha.
so weird.

this week isn't as packed as last week. praise God for that. so that i've moments where i can rest.
but still, be free to call me out!
thurs there's choir practice. hope i'll have strength for that. cause i'll be working one full day at TK, then at church. but in Christ, my strength will be renewed, i'll soar on wings like eagle. AMEN!


blessed week to the rest of you.
lots of love (:

valentine's special

valentines is really a commercialized event.

but yet, couples still celebrate this special day.

i was quite down initially. because this was the first year, i had to celebrate v day alone.

but during the last minute after work, dorcas invited me to her place for dinner.

and i guess it was really good, though i was exhausted after work and i fell asleep twice.

haha.

but i learnt how to cook a dish.

and when i returned home. i found a bouquet of sunflowers. that my dear had specially ordered for by delivery. (it cost alot man)

haha. i was surprised. really touched too.

then we celebrated our valentine's on sat.

hmm. actually the twosome became a family lunch.

haha. then we head back to home, because of exhaustion i guess.

then i prepared dinner.

hahaha. so i cooked (:

and he loved the food. he finished up the whole pot.

i'm just so glad he love it.

although it was a very short time. but it was really quality time spent.

we could just sit down and talk about our relationship. ways to make it more Godly.

and we recommitted our relationship to the father.

we've came a long way. going through a lot of ups and downs. there were plenty of tough time. not being able to meet up and all. but i'm so glad, that we have God in our lifes.

because God is the one who holds our relationship so tightly.

i'm very thankful this valentines, that i've got a good guy to protect me, to love me, to hold me in his arms. i'm very thankful that this is the guy God has permitted me to be with, to be finally engaged with and ready for marriage.

i'm thankful that this is the only guy that i was able to open my heart up to. to be able to talk problems out. to talk and encourage each other, being each other's pillar of support.

i thank God for answering both of our prayers at that moment of time.

i pray that we will continue to love each other, to be strong in our relationship. and may God continue to bless our relationship that will prosper. let us be the couple that serve you always.

in the most precious Lord's name Jesus Christ, Amen.

loving them always.

more pictures of other children i managed to take pictures of (:



this is xiuwen. she has a lovely smile. very teachable. very clingy. but very cute (:

i'm not sure whether this is jimson or brandson. cause they are twins. haha. i was told that the more active one is jimson. so i think this is jimson. they are special kids. but they are very adorable. though i do get hurt while taking care of them.

this is ruifeng. he is very smart. a primary 1 boy. but i heard that when he was in K2, he could already do P2's work. i enjoy teaching him. cause he's a fast learner (: and he's smile is gorgeous.

my heart melts. haha.

this is angel. she's a lil hard to teach. because of her random attitude problem. working on it.
but she's quite an adult (: haha. she's p3 i think.

this is my buddy at work. caron. she has a great heart. and great patience. a virtue i must learn from her. haha.

this is my dear p1 jonathan. he's bogay.. but very small and cute.

my whole week at student care has taught me quite a lot of lessons.

1) respect must be earned not demanded.
look at auntie imm, jacinta or frankie. they have their way of handling kids. although they're fierce, the kids still respect them.

2) it takes a lot of compassion, patience and love to deal with the special children. but i'm deeply reminded that Jesus loves little children. so i pray that i will have a heart like Jesus.

3) taking care of childrens are very challenging. you've to be alert at all times and not let your guard down. or things might happen.

4) it is not the shouting, the screaming, the scolding at children that disciplines them. it is the reasoning, the heart that tells them you care and you love them that helps them obey you.

5) i've been reminded to keep relying on God's strength and not mine. afterall, this is God's ministry. not mine, not auntie imm, not auntie margaret. i'm not working for the sake of getting a job. but it's a ministry that touches life.

so this are the main points i got out of one week. it had been really tough. but this is a race marked out for me at this moment. i want to end off well. to be a fulfillment. God has placed me in Telok Kurau to do a different work. it may seem tough at first. but i know that there are things that i need to do. and this really reminds me of my objective in working at student care.

and so dear friends, my prayer request this season is that:

1) i will be able to have that heart like Jesus who loves little children

2) i will have patience and endurance to deal with these children

3) i will be healthy and not fall sick so easily (i'm doing smth bout it.)

4) that i will always remember that it's God ministry and to rely on his strength.

5) that my righteousness is not mine, its from God.

6) provide me with many opportunities to touch lives

7) to love the unlovable with all my heart.

8) not to be too emotionally attached to all the children. but to be brave and move on to telok kurau primary in two weeks time.

i know my prayer request is long. but please keep me in prayers.
with lots of love.

valentine's post coming up next.

attachment photos !!

like i said, i will upload photos!
haha.
this are the people that i mix around with every day at attachment (:


left to right: Nazim, Trina, Jessie, Me, Khar Eng
Joy & Me

Seri (: she's very funny arh!

Shikin! (:
Khar Eng, Roger, Me

Serene (:

Seri, Me, Audrey
Rebecca (:
(she very pretty right?)
my lovable pauline (: hahaha miss her a lot you know!

she very funny arh!

this is the most awesome place in SAL, it's at the gallery upstairs. and the view is so good !

and attachment has ended. time to move on.

haha.

had a great time the last week at attachment (:

hmmm, and i'm so tired now. off to sleep for awhile and wait for baby to call

another challenging day tmr

people have been telling me i have lost weight.

hmm, even after cny, there are still pple who ask me , "qiqi you look like you lost a lot of weight."

haha. that's a good thing!

hahaha. hopefully i will lose more while i work at student care. since i'm on my feet most of the day.

and looking after the children is really not easy!

looking forward to tmr (:

btw, i'm having a lonely valentine's this year.

bleah. miss my baby so much !

hehe.

updates (:

long post ahead (:
haha.

been so busy lately.
chinese new year & my first day of work at BCCSC student care.


chinese new year was a blast.
it was like a total of 5 days + spent with my love.
and it was more than enough.

i miss him dearly though. pictures with him (:


went to seletar camp again with baby! with costa too. he was the photographer. (:
i really love that place. haha.

met up with lynette the 2nd last day before attachment ended. missed her really a lot.
we caught up with each other a lot! and its really a lot! and she's leaving for shanghai soon.
sigh so depressing.
btw, lynette, i just want to tell you that student care is a fulfiling job. its making me smile all over again (: i will pick myself up. i promise you that when you come back from shanghai, you'll see a different me (: i love you lots!

i shall upload my photos on my last day of attachment later.
but right now,
i'm introducing to you my two most lovable children in student care. they are so cutee! (:
there are more. but they wouldn't let me take their pictures.
they started punching me when i wouldn't delete it. -.-

the one on the right is lovable vanessa, she's a really good girl and pretty too. on the left, is her good friend denise. sweet lil girl (:

i tell you, both of them started playing some role-playing game. denise served vanessa imaginery food. and they are so cute lah! haha.

this is jensen. i'm not sure whether i got his name right. but he's really lovable.


he posed for me! i was so so happy.
he was like, "qiqi jiejie, do you have a boyfriend?"
then i was like, "yah, i have"
and he and ezekiel went "eeeeeeeee."

super funny.
i would miss them a lot if i go to Telok Kurau Primary ))))):
hope i don't get too emotional.

today's work was really the ultimate.
the best job i ever had in my entire life.
something that was just so lively. (:
i feel so alive now.
hahaha. but my ears are like dying of the noise made.
and i hope i don't lose my voice
i had a hard time trying to bring 4 kids from the playground back to student care.
hahaha.

may God bless me with his guidance and patience with the kids!!
hahaha.
but i love.


(:

SIP ending (:

just when attachment is coming to and end, i begin to enjoy the company i have here, the environment, the food and i'll miss it all.

its been a great joy coming to know the people working here.
had my fair share of laughter and joy. of course the times, where i just worked non-stop too. running from places to places, but it was all so great (:



recently, i've been dwelling in a problem that i do not know how to get out of there.
but i appreciate the fact that there are people around me.
my polar, my best friend and ate.

it was really so comforting to know that there are people who bothers.
i try my best not to dwell in there.
now, i'm very bloated.
had a super duper full lunch with pauline and seri (:
had a great time too.
that right now, i'm dozing off.


lots of emails has been sent between pauline and i.
she's a mad crazy lady.
but i love (:



god bless to all at work (:

(:

i love you baby.

baby booked out on friday night.

went simpang bedok with him & his parents and joyce.

really fabulous time spent together. & i love the food (:

been jogging 3 times a week for the last two weeks. i think its really good to lift up your Sprits.

yesterday baby had a high fever in the morning, pulled myself out of bed at 6am cause i had stupid stomach pains. and then rushed to his house to nurse my sick baby.

haha. he was really warm when i reached his place. i reached at 7am!

hmm, poor thing.

but God being so good, being our healer, baby was well by noon. let him sleep more. & some stupid random stuff happen. i was brawling like a baby then. not wanting to let him go for mentoring cellgroup. -.- haha. maybe it was due to the last two weeks, trying to be really strong and not shed a single tear, i cried so much on saturday. and he cried. i was really upset that i made him cried.

but again, it always melt my heart to see him shed a single tear. (: he's my precious.

haha. then sunday went to church with a heavy heart not due to him, but a lot of other struggles and burdens. so worship was power today!

it was one that you can just see everyone so touched by God's presence, wanting more & more of him. i was totally touched to tears, reminded of God's grace and love, that we are forgiven.

so it was really a moment, where i could just sing out praises for God in whatever circumstances - good or bad.

sermon was a good one too.

so i can say, i'm really renewed in Spirit today (:

i'm going to catch my beauty sleep soon.

i miss my baby so much as usual.

saturday afternoon or sunday morning he'll be back, whatever it is. God bless him, protect him, keep him healthy, help him excel in everything he does. i pray that God will grant him favor with his superiors. he'll not get into trouble. and just be with him 24/7. and thankyou Father, for a great man you've given me. (:

amen.

it is so true, that a christian must marry a christian. so that they can nurture and grow spiritually in Christ (:

and boy, why did i not meet you earlier? you're the best thing that ever happened to me.

i was reminded of what aaron chan said, "you're gonna be with him for eternity, on earth for prolly another 80 years and in heaven forever!"

hahhaa. that's true! & everything is just so awesome!

baby, having you by my side really really make me feel blessed.

but i know i've to snapped out of this love fantasy and be independent.

and my goal right now is: to do well at Student Care, to impact and touch the lives of the children.

this is definitely not my end-point, but oh Lord, whatever it is you want me to do for you, i'll obey you and do your good works. i pray you'll guide me, you'll teach me your ways. and i'll just grow and draw closer to you.

(:

blessed week, everyone.

p.s Valentine's is coming soon. hehehe.